Episode 44| ASMR Honeymoon Phase

Hey! Hi! It’s me MommaQueue. I welcome you to Moments in Queue ASMR episode. In this episode I will titilate your ear with my voice and random sounds. 

In Queue today: 60 seconds of heaven > What’s going on > Let’s get it popping> and croak on the joke. 

I talk about still being in the honeymoon phase with the love of my Mike Foxtrot life. Remind people that if you wanna see if you relationship is stronger than a few Shein wardrobe washes do DIY projects with each other and go to couples therapy. Speaking of couples I had to do a trigger warning when speaking on KeKe Palmer’s alleged relationship status. And provided some tell tale signs cause I don’t want Black love to be struggle love anymore. Yeah I know survivor’s guilt. Be safe in these dating streets. Oh and I apologize for being late and a dolla short yet again. I am gonna get it together. I promise! 

Chapters

• 0:33 Mama Q's Relationship and Appliance Mishaps
• 16:11 Identify Red and Green Relationship Flags
• 21:10 Netflix Show
• 25:48 Bringing Back Roman Numerals

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:33

M-O-Double-M-A-Q-D-A-W-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E. That's my name, mama Q. M-o-double-m-a-q-d-a-w-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e. That's my name. Mama Q, say it faster. Slow don't really matter, though. The U-E gets a minute. Tongue tizzy. Yo, hey, kinda dizzy bro. Who is she? Mama Q, mama gave birth little ways, no girth 60 years ago. No, I don't want. Mo Q is a line and I tried to align this double end. Tundra petty, haha, it's one of my mantras. Mama Q, I'm the first one in and the first one out. Memphis Tend to Key is my whereabouts. Don't complain. Man saying stick it to one topic. I reply your mind is very myopic with Mama Q. You need better optis picking and choosing to copy me. Are you inspired? Definitely. No need to whisper gracefully. I like it better off key. Now let's see. Do you remember me? M-o-double-m-a-q-d-a-w-e-e-e-e-e-e-e. That's my name, mama Q. Hey, hi, it's me, mama Q. I welcome you to Mama Tend Q. Asmr episode.

Speaker 2: 1:55

In this episode I will titillate your ear with my voice and random sounds In Q. Today's 60 seconds of having what's going on. Let's get it popping and croak on the joke. What's going on in this segment? I'll tell you what's been going on in my life since last episode. Yet again, I apologize for being late to this episode, but y'all, I was tired, how tired, super tired, these past days. I was working out of town and it kicked my ass. I needed one more day of rest. I'm telling y'all I will get it together with these ASMR episodes. Alright, on to the show.

Speaker 2: 2:51

I already knew that my boo thing, my love of my, mike Fox Trout life is the one, the one, the one, and he keeps showing up for me. But, baby, when we went to couples therapy such a breath of fresh air. I know I oughta not compare my past with my present, but my present continues to remind me how fucked up my past was. So, as y'all know, my abusive ex and I went to couples therapy. That asshole didn't even sit next to me, he blamed a lot of things on me and it didn't resolve our issues. But my boo thing, my boo thing, though y'all, he sat next to me on the couch as we discussed our relationship with my therapist, I received reassurance and support that he loves me and he accepts me as I am. That had me crying, like literally all my mental issues that he know of were not being used against me. He wants to help me if it's possible and he acknowledged my quirks. That makes me who I am. And later on, last week y'all we did DIY together and that was another instance that I knew we belong together.

Speaker 2: 4:11

The entire time we were both frustrated with the washing machine and the dishwasher, but we didn't take it out on each other. We regrouped, reassessed what was going on and we tried again and stuff. So I talked about this on TikTok, but let me tell y'all, so y'all won't make the same mistakes I and it. Well, we made okay. So with my garbage disposal that MF was not working. And when the garbage I mean when the dishwasher would go with the garbage disposal it would back up. So I figured, huh, I must have gunk in the dishwasher. I tried to clean it up and the dishwasher was doing what it was supposed to do. And then one day, when my bull thing, love of my life, was over my house, him and I together, had noticed that it was still backed up. And he looked and he was like you need a new dishwash, I mean, I'm sorry, a new garbage disposal. So we went to our local home improvement store and got a garbage disposal, put it together everything y'all. Here is the part that I did not know. So please do not make the same mistakes that we made. Okay, when you get a new garbage disposal, and if you have the tube that connects to the dishwasher, remove that tube. Okay, please do, because we did not.

Speaker 2: 5:34

And let me tell you what happened. Oh my gosh. So where did the tap come from? We installed the new garbage disposal and the water was still packing up with the dishwasher. So we're like, huh, it must still be clogged. So we ran, we ran some drain cleaner down the tube and it went through. So we're like, okay, the clog is doing what it's supposed to be doing, it shouldn't be packed up, all contrails. I'm unsure, like, oh my gosh, that thing was back back back backing it up, and not in a good way. It messed up all of the towels with all that Clorox, whatever the heck kind of chemicals were in there, and it flooded the kitchen floor and we're like what is going on. And so we ran in a couple more times and kept on sudden and flooding and we was like what? And randomly shout out to the ancestors. I was able to Google and figured out what happened and show no, we did not remove the plug. Once we removed the plug from the new garbage disposal that connected to the dishwasher tube, everything was good. But we had to run in a couple more times in order to get all the suds out from the drain and it is working as it should.

Speaker 2: 6:59

Now on to the dishwasher. I mean, shoot, I'm so sorry. The washing machine, all right. So the washing machine we had noticed that it would have water at the bottom and so I didn't like pay attention to it like that, because it wasn't always like that with every load. But when he was over there he noticed that he was like what's going on? I was like I don't know, is this normal? I thought, because we were, almost we were over a feeling. The wash machine, but this time it was extremely small load, so I didn't understand. So we disconnected it from the, from the wall, and we did YouTube University, trying to figure out to what is the word I'm looking for? Oh yeah, it escapes me, damn it. Looking for a way to take apart, disconnect, disassemble the washing machine. Okay, so we figured it out.

Speaker 2: 8:00

At first we thought that the issue was like it needed there. We go, sorry about that. So at first we thought that the issue was that it needed to be cleaned. And so we went to YouTube University and we messed with because it's a front load washing machine. So we disconnected the gasket and the little spring and everything and cleaned it.

Speaker 2: 8:23

That was not the issue. So then he was like, okay, let's try a different way. So we removed the back of it and realized where it was coming from. And so he was like, okay, it's inside the washing machine. So he went to the light, the control panel underneath it, and that made the floor, all the water came out and stuff. We thought that fixed it. It did not. And so he was like we need to figure out how to take the top of the washing machine. So we took the top off, thanks to cool, and we realized what it was. And so here's another thing that was hilarious to me.

Speaker 2: 9:00

So when we read the home improvement store the first time, getting stuff for the garbage disposal, slash, dishwasher something that told me that we needed to get some kind of silicone. But I kind of ignored it because it was a fleeting message and stuff and I didn't know how to explain it to my um but they love my life Like we need to get this, shoulda listened, but all well. So we went back to figure out what was needed and show, no, when you went down that aisle and we needed a silicone, cause the plan was to fill up the hole with silicone and electrical tape versus buying a part, cause it was such a small hole which all of my talk about I don't know but just roll with me. So anyway, we took care of all of that and about time I came back from work, the washing machine was working and like again, if I did not know that he was the one, y'all the one doing all that stuff, would show me, because I know that, like at least for me, sometimes when I get frustrated I want to just say fuck that shit. But he was so calm, it was like we're going to get it. He kept using the word we, we, we and stuff. It's not like he was speaking French and that just reassured me. Man, me feels so loved. Like yes, he did most of the work and he told, showed me and taught me how to do some of the work, but it was nice that it was a teamwork and nobody was mad or upset with each other, frustrated at each other, the problem, the task that we had to do, yes, but like kept going back and forth to our local home and proofing store. Like, nobody was mad at each other and I think that that was great. So, okay, if you want to know if they're the one for you, do some DIY stuff, alright.

Speaker 2: 10:53

So another thing that I realized is that we are still in our honeymoon phase. Like I'm so happy. So, like I had said earlier, I was gone, working out of town for about four days and, oh my gosh, when I saw my boo thing, when he picked me up oh, we need to pick me up I had this big old smile on my face and I read to him Okay, mind you, we weren't gone, but four days from each other. And so like, of course, one would think that's what we're here towards, like why are you still missing this person, or whatever. But that's when I realized again that we still have this on a move face and I'm still In love with him and I love him like so much y'all, wow.

Speaker 2: 11:41

And so I went to therapy today and I was telling her my therapist out like I'm loving the honeymoon phase and I'm thankful for for Helping me as our therapist by doing her job, you know, helping me realize my issues and working through them. And I told her that, unfortunately, I have survivor skill because, again, as y'all know, I have been in DV relationships before and not all of us survived them. So a two-time survivor and I just have sometimes a five a skill, cuz it's like dang, I survived it but not everybody else does. And it's like, with all of my quirks and my faults and my mental stuff, that this man still loves me, he still cares for me, he makes me laugh, I make him laugh. We have ourself a great old time and we miss each other, like genuinely miss each other.

Speaker 2: 12:41

And again, like I told y'all, he had been gone for what? Like nine months, and I missed him so dull, but it's like he's been back on for like almost a month and again I still miss them from being gone for four months. So, oh, such a brother, fresh air. And so again, I'm thankful to my therapist and, of course, my ancestors, because I'm pretty sure I told y'all, but I'll tell y'all again. A Month before we really got together, I had prayed for him and told my ancestors the kind of man that I want and, oh my gosh, they came through with the came through. So, oh my gosh. So with everybody, and says, just my higher self and my therapist, like all of us working together, like it helped me find love and I'm so happy, thankful and blessed to have him in my life. Love, ya, boo thing. All right. So the next thing that's going on in my life is I'm a aunt again. Whoa, whoa, my sister, she had her baby. Both are healthy.

Speaker 2: 13:48

But thinking how we finished the series, snowfall, the TV show, it was not as good as Godfather Holland, but it was all right. So if you want to suggest some other shows for us to look at, let us know, because, again, clearly there are people out here that listen to me. So, like email me, let's I don't know, talk about shit or whatever like that. Um, so we're gonna take a break with looking at shows on binge watching shows for a little bit until Next week, because we got him and I got a lot of things going on in our life. So I was like, okay, give us time and stuff. And, last but not least, the cowboys beat the brakes off the giant. A, we don't boys, let's get it popping. I blow out the bubbles surrounding pop culture and talk about it. Trick or warning about abuse. Alright y'all.

Speaker 2: 14:48

Kiki Palmer allegedly was in the DV situation with her now ex-boyfriend and the father of their child. Sadly, like I had said earlier, as a two-time survivor I had a feeling he could potentially be controlling, insecure and or abusive, based off his now deleted tweet that I'm very afraid of the word he said. She's a mother. I'm glad she survived alleged abuse. As I said earlier, not all of us make it out alive. As you should know, most victims of DV are cis women, but my opinion is for all victims, especially all women, which do include trans and cis, because trans women are women.

Speaker 2: 15:33

Some men are violent and we gotta try to see the red flags in time If it escalates to abuse. The first time should be the only time, because, y'all, they rarely stop. As I mentioned before, abuse will look different, but the basics are usually the same. Please, y'all, if you can avoid the insecure, obel, sexual, controlling and love bombing type of men Google their first, middle and last name, if possible, to see if they've been arrested before for any type of violence, regardless if it was thrown out or if it stuck. See if they respect your boundaries as well.

Speaker 2: 16:11

I saw this on TikTok and unfortunately I forgot the creator name. But I think this is a cool little quote unquote trick. Well, okay, not a trick, but a test to ensure or to verify about this person. See if they are red or green flag. I think the TikTok creator called it a dud. Okay, so this is how it goes.

Speaker 2: 16:34

You have to tell the person something that doesn't really bother you to see if they'll use it again she was so too things that the person had said that they had used. They had told X co-worker at the time. Well, the co-worker they're no longer working with them, but when they first worked together had told the co-worker that they're afraid of ghosts. So you know, that's something like you know, like it could be seen as something that most people are. So when that particular co-worker got into it, they had said something along the lines of that's why you're afraid of ghosts, and the content created from TikTok had totally forgot that they had told that person about them being afraid of ghosts. And so another thing was when this TikTok creator was dating someone, they had told the person that they don't like their middle name, which was a lie, because that person had no problems with their middle name, but they had to double check to see if this person was a red flag or a green flag. So they was like I do not like my middle name at all, please do not ever call me my middle name and show enough time and pass in that person Head intentionally, call that person the middle name and stuff. And so that's when the TikTok content creator knew that that person was a red flag.

Speaker 2: 17:56

And so, like I said, you have to ensure that whatever it is that you're telling them about is something that that it's not going to be triggering for you and see if they will use that against you later. Now, obviously, this is not an N-D-O-P all kind of test, because, as my therapist and I have talked about before, is that, you know, not every single abuser is the same, if that makes any sense. You know there's different ways that people can abuse and there's different techniques, tactics that they use, so this won't be a catch all, but again, you gotta ensure that they're not love bombing you and if they do tell you that that they love you early, ask them what they love about you. Just you can hear what they feel about. And if it's usually stuff that you do for them like oh, I love the way you iron my clothes, or or if it's something like physical, like oh, I love the way your body, be body, you know, something like that that could be a telltale sign that that person does not really love you like they say they do. They just say you as a person who can do things for them, and if that's something that you want to do, I guess that's cool and stuff.

Speaker 2: 19:12

But you know, I'm hoping that I can. I know I can't save everyone, but I'm hoping to like give examples and have people learn that this struggle of is played out and that's not love. Like you want healthy love and stuff. And I know how this could come across as someone like oh, now that I got love, you know I want everybody else to get it. Well, yeah, I do if there's something that someone wants.

Speaker 2: 19:38

But also I don't like hearing all these stories about women and it's mostly women, like I said getting hurt, injured and not making it to the next day because they want to leave a relationship or they realize that this is not the person that they want to be with and they divorce them, leave them whatever or defend themselves and the courts don't care about that. Or they are too late because there's no evidence to get um order for protection, because some of them come, some of these mfs are slick, or it's just it's too late and sometimes when we get in this relationships we can't get out. So I'm hoping, like if I can tell y'all that I survived and there's still a possibility for me to find love, then maybe you can be encouraged to try to find love too, because again, I'm sick and tired of black love being the struggle of. So that's um my advice to try to see if you can just continue to try to see these red flags and stuff, because it's a fucking do see when you try to get out of these type of relationships and stuff, like I said, and when you do try to fix yourself after these relationships so that you can be healthy, mentally healthy and clear. That can be a lot to unlearn. So just, and this is why I always say that I freaking love therapy nothing, everybody's shaft therapy.

Speaker 2: 21:11

All right, continuing on with talking about DIY, randomly I saw, and ironically, randomly and ironically I saw the show on Netflix and it looks old as shit. But Netflix said it came out in 2023 and I think that was a mistake. Maybe 2003, but anyway, the name of this show. It's called um, what is it? Damn it? Love in the wild. Sorry. Okay, the name of the Netflix show is called Love in the Wild and it's similar to the DIY situation I spoke earlier with my partner. So what it is is heterosexual, cisgendered couples are paired to conquer their wild together and, of course, it's reality TV and y'all. I stop believing in reality love TV shows thanks to Flavor or Flav in New York.

Speaker 2: 22:02

But I saw one episode and it's a good background noise type of show, but the premise is kind of cool because you get to be these team type of scenarios and stuff. So for the first episode, the woman gets the big. It's 10 people, if I'm not. Yeah, it's 10 people, if I'm not mistaken. So five men, five women, and the women gets the big first, who they want to choose to be a partner with and, if I'm not mistaken, as well, throughout the show you can pick another partner if you're not really feeling that person because you know they got to have drama in the show, whatever, whatever.

Speaker 2: 22:39

So the first task was to build a raft and supposedly crocodiles or alligators, whichever one is in the water. But let's be honest, I'm pretty sure they're nowhere near the water because there will be a liability. But the point is it was a team-building exercise. So you know, when you do team-building type of situations, like building a raft together, you just met this person. So when you first meet this person, you know, sometimes you go through these like what am I trying to say? You go through these kind of acts of like, who's gonna run the team? And it's usually men who like to be the ones to run shit and stuff, which that's a whole other thing that I don't like. But anyway, two people who just met each other, they have to build a raft. So obviously you want the raft to be able to float, because if it doesn't float then you're out in the water with these crocodiles or whatnot and stuff. And so because of that premise, I like it. Only because you get to, I feel like you get to see what type of person you could potentially be dealing with, because you know there are a lot of people who are competitive and there's nothing wrong with that. But some competitive people, they sometimes go a little bit too far and they're annoying and they're like disrespectful because they're like go team, go one in a whim. And of course, if you are trying to build a raft, you want to build it where it can float so you won't fall. And again, because does a team-building exercise, you know there'll be those people who are like oh, it's your fault or whatever like that.

Speaker 2: 24:17

So the short version is a lot of people on social media had called it a love show, with the amazing race coming to its do it. So, like I said, I only saw the first episode and whatever, whatever. So I don't know. Again, I'm starting to like not want to give with reality TV shows anyway anymore because I don't like the extra drama that these TV shows make you do. And now, yeah, I understand that back in the days when I liked Sally, jesse, raphael, jenny Jones and Mori, then even a Rado that you know their producers or whatnot, told them to be extra dramatic and I guess, because I was young and I didn't know no better, I thought that she was cool. But now it's like I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm so tired of like TV shows and social media and everything being so fake, and so it's like plants and planted for it to be this way that I don't like it no more. I kind of want genuine, real stuff. But you know, if it ain't dramatic, people ain't gonna watch it. So it is what it is, but whatever. So that's my old view on it and I think that's about it as far as pop culture, Because, like I said, I've been kind of busy these past few days so I have had a real ability to really pay attention to what's been going on in pop culture. So, yeah, check it out, Tell me what you think.

Speaker 2: 25:48

Croak on the joke. That's why I give you my bestest jokes and we laugh together, or not? Today's joke who is in favor of bringing Roman numerals back into use? I for one Get it. I for one. Well, I guess that's my cue to leave.