Episode 48| ASMR Leaping Back into the Podcast

Hey! Hi! It’s me MommaQueue. I welcome you to Moments in Queue ASMR episode. In this episode I will titilate your ear with my voice and random sounds. 

In Queue today: 60 seconds of heaven > What’s going on > it’s giving > Let’s get it popping> and croak on the joke. 

I am back! Catching up on viral moments from the end of 2023 til now. Then I get a lil serious talking about forgiveness versus justice so you can be an elevated ancestor. 

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Q ASMR Moments
• 6:49 Forgiveness and Justice
• 15:04 Child Abuse, Change, and Forgiveness
• 19:56 The Meaning of Forgiveness and Justice

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:30

M O, double M A Q. Double U E. Double U E, that's my name. Mamma Q. M O, double M A Q. Double U E, double U E, that's my name. Mamma Q, say it faster or slow, don't really matter, though the U E gets a minute tongue tizzy. Yo hey, kinda dizzy bro. Who is she? Mama Q? Mama gave birth little ways, no girth, 60 years ago. No, I don't want more. Q is a line and I tried to align this double end to hundred petty ha ha. It's one of my modules. Mama Q, I'm the first one in and the first one out. Memphis Tend to Key is my whereabouts. Don't complain. Main saying stick it to one topic. I reply your mind is very myopic with mama Q. You need better optist picking and choosing to copy me. Are you inspired? Definitely, no need to whisper gracefully. I like it better off key. Now let's see. Do you remember me? M-o-w-m-a-q-d-u-u-e-d-a-w-e that's my name, mama Q. M-o-w-m-a-q-d-u-u-e-d-a-w-e that's my name, mama Q.

Speaker 2: 1:54

Hi, it's me, Mama Q. I welcome you to Moments in Q ASMR episode. In this episode I will titillate your ear with my voice and random sounds In Q today, 60 seconds of having what's going on. It's giving let's get it popping, and growl on the joke. What's going on? In this segment I tell you what's going on in my life since last episode. Well y'all, there's not too much to share. Yeah, I know I've been gone since November. After my truck in division failed, I had no choice but to get a job. So I'm currently in training for my new job. It's going well and I'm the only woman that was hired. The training is intense but well worth it. Shout out to the ancestors for helping me secure the job During this time away.

Speaker 2: 3:53

My boo thinkin' I am parked on view in the Marvel movies and TV shows in timeline order. We had to take a break and rewind. After falconin' in the Winter Soldier, disney added the Defenders timeline, so currently we are on season one of Iron Fist. My mini-me had her birthday, so I gotta update my intro song cause, wow, she's 17. Time has flown by, alright, that's all that I got on with the show. Let's get it popping.

Speaker 2: 4:30

I blow out the bubbles surrounding pop culture, and I talk about it. I've been gone for a minute and I missed all the interest and think pieces, in my opinion, that no one asks for From. Is it Mr Simone Bowles or Mrs Jonathan Owens? Cat would tell you a joke, but not a lie. I'm Barbies vs Hotties and my personal favorite are you the shit or a fart? 2024 has been interesting as fuck thus far, and we're only in month 2.

Speaker 2: 5:04

My short version take on all this is from the astrology people that said 2024 is the year of the truth. The medium version of it is as follows as a woman that has survived toxic and DV relationships no, I won't go into details at this time, I don't want to trick you on my first time being solo for the year I have survivors killed For the ladies and, yes, this includes trans women and non-binary that are victims. So me personally, when I hear a read about someone so partnered trying to harm their partner, I get pissed and sad, but I know not everyone wants to be saved. I want to save everyone, though I know how that makes me seem, but I'm not arrogant. I'm still in shock. I found a healthy partner, so I hope others can find one too, because, yeah, if I can, you can too. I know how like not the stupid but lame and corny that may sound, but I think I've said this before. As someone who is polyamorous into BDSM, I feel like my circle of meeting potential love would be just limited to my serve. And then to find someone like my boot-a-ang love of my Mifox Trot life, it's like okay, so there is hope. So that's what I mean when I say if I can make it, then I feel like you know there could be somebody for someone else. So the problem that I think is what's healthy to me might not be healthy to someone else. So I guess a better stance for me is if you like it, I love it.

Speaker 2: 6:48

On what is it? On TikTok there was this woman who had met I forgot her name, I think it's April. She had allegedly yeah, let's use the word allegedly met her fiance online in like 30 days and stuff, and someone had found out about it and allegedly her fiance ex-girlfriend had found out about it and wanted to do a cautionary tale and stuff. And of course there's people in the comments who are all like yeah, you know, I met my significant other and we'd be married this many years, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And so for me, again, nobody asks for my opinion as a survivor I am always leery of those type of people, but at the same time I can almost understand because, like my boo thing and I, we hit it off great and we've been tight ever since, but like we like what he told me, he let me with like three months into the relationship or whatever, and like he's never violated my trust or anything like that. So for me, what I think it is is that yes, there are these one-off situations where somebody can find someone that they love and it seems to be going to go fast. But I think the difference between that is if someone is love bombing you versus if someone is like really loving you and respecting you. So, yeah, as an outsider looking in, I'm like I'm like, I'm like I'm like I'm like I'm no-transcript. I think her name, like I said, I think her name is April. I'm like concerned about her and I know I shouldn't give a shit or whatever, but it's like you know, like I said, survivor's kill, but at the same time, yeah, if you like it, I love it. So like that's how I feel about that. I went off on a tangent oh well, so yeah, if you like it, I love it. So moving on, when it comes to beef, be it comedic or rap, I'm here for the nonviolent drama.

Speaker 2: 8:59

Something about displaying your creativity and receipts give me a little wet wet. I get annoyed, though, because no matter what the responder says, most people talk about everything, but it's what was said, true or not. Like, for example are you in the Illuminati? Did you steal that joke? I don't care how much money you have Versus Cat Williams, I don't care if you got a movie out. Did you wear the dress? And usually survey will say yes, ding, ding, ding.

Speaker 2: 9:30

It continues to bout for me how some survivors dig on non-survivors. That's that brainwashing to me. I remember years ago I felt like old girl from basketball wise wasn't allegedly abused from Tyrell Owens Because she got headbutted. I was slick, offended because of what I endured was more than just a headbutt, but I've been changed, because headbutts get turned into so much more. So when I learned about Nikki allegedly being a pig, me and laughing at Meg, I'm like errr. Or allegedly not telling the barbs to stop doxing people. They disagree or you're gonna be behind bars. It's disturbing Like this is when real life can make you turn into a speed bump too, and I feel like the world is really fulfilling the movie Idiocracy, I think that's how you pronounce it.

Speaker 2: 10:23

So yesterday I was at Tarjag. It was a long ass line. When we came in, my partner and I were very confused Like why is there a long line to get to the self checkout when the other lines that have cashiers are not full? So when we were done shopping we saw the line and bypassed it to have a human check us out. This cashier near us screamed line one is open, line one is open, line one is open. Like three times I was so confused Like some of y'all are near line one but you're in the line for self checkout. A customer was annoyed because people got out of the self checkout line to go to number one and somehow she felt like she got skipped. Like what? You decided to stay in the self checkout line. These folks got out of the self checkout line to go to see a cashier. How did they skip you?

Speaker 2: 11:17

I say all that to say at the end of the day, are you gonna stay uninformed in a long line waiting to do unpaid labor or checking yourself out without first verifying what this long line is? Or are you gonna make your own decision to stay in the long ass line Cause you've been waiting this long, even though you see cashier lines are shorter? Consider it's giving. I'm giving you the encouragement to make it through the week. Let's tackle eating that elephant together, one bite at a time. So I realized that I was supposed to do this one first, but some way, somehow, I don't know, shut up to the ancestors, I end up doing the popping one first and I'm not gonna copy and paste it and cut it, so you will deal All right.

Speaker 2: 12:11

So, justice versus forgiveness. Months ago, many me had a reading with my mentor, an Ancestor that's Isn't elevated because she won't forgive the guy that allegedly killed her. Pamela instructed us that we can't have her assist us with anything here going on, like you know, jobs or protection or anything like that, because her energy would be chaotic Because it's not directed in the proper place. The one thing Pamela said that stuck out was forgiveness and justice are not the same thing. It was instructed that we try to encourage her to forgive the man. It got me thinking about family members.

Speaker 2: 12:54

So I'm not able to forgive yet and I want to be an elevated ancestor and I really don't know what to do about that, um, because you know, like I'm still learning about who do, obviously, and I know that some people try to break their generational Curses and I do understand that there are some ancestors out there I assume for me but also could be for others that might need some healing and some assistance and stuff, and so what comes with that is that they're still elevated and I know some ancestors who, when they were here, they treated me a certain way and I was very shocked and surprised that some of them were elevated. So obviously I don't know in great detail, like what's the rule break to be a Honorable and enlightened ancestor? Not, but I know that when the time comes I definitely want to be one. And it's like difficult for me to. If what's holding me back is forgiveness, because I think about all the things that the woman that gave birth to me did to me In my life and I'm having difficulty For giving her.

Speaker 2: 14:09

I remember, um, I had mistakenly called her mom. So for some reason oh sorry, I apologize, I'm mistaken called her mom in a text message With my dad and my mini me, and so she ended up telling my sister ash about it and thought we were making progress and I'm like no, it just would have been weird to say dad and insert her name here. So I said parents or mom or some shit like that, and like that's cute and all that she's trying. But what really bothers me, at least in my experience with people, is they always want to try and do better, but rarely do they ever want to apologize for what they did, as if, like being nice Um can atone for the shit that you did. You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2: 15:05

For me, okay, child abuse is what I feel like I endured from her and, of course, people older than me, younger or whatever We'll say. All that wasn't child abuse, but because back in my days this happened, it was much worse than you. Hey, you know, like I said in the previous segment that you know, thank goodness for change, where I no longer am trying to compare what abuse is to mine, because it's not what they call it the, the third olympics I forgot, but something, something, olympics. It's not that we shouldn't be competing for old edit words, we should just know that it's not good. So that's one of the reasons and I'm pretty sure I've said this before Is that I try my absolute best to educate my ancestors as much as I can so I can, like, help them to new verbiage and technology and a different thinking, a different process of thinking about things. Then what was probably available to them when they were here?

Speaker 2: 16:11

For example, I remember like Growing up believing dead oh, this trigger warning. So I had looked at Revenge of the nerds and there was a time when one of the nerds was with the cheerleader and she thought that that was her significant other and so she consented. But she didn't. She consented, thinking that that was her significant other, not the nerd, right? And so Growing up younger, when I saw that I thought that was pretty cute and hot. But as I learned, like, oh no, cuz she, like I just said, consented to her Partner, not the nerd, and you know she was okay with it, all this other stuff.

Speaker 2: 17:03

So it's like again, just speaking about me and the thought process that I had when I was younger, up into now I've changed and, yes, a lot of people which it aggravates me, but a lot of people don't want to change, don't want to learn new verbiage, don't want to treat people better, they just want everything to be status quo and stuff and, like I said, I don't like that and I Think the best way for people, in my opinion, to change is, of course, change behavior, but also to apologize, cuz, oh my gosh again, the woman that gave birth to me has done a whole lot to me, and our final straw was when she got the police on me and so are doing that. I just I don't know if I can ever forgive her, and Even if she would apologize, I don't know if I could forgive that either, because, like, as the saying goes, when someone shows you who they are, you believe them. So to me, over the past 40 years, she show me what kind of person she is, and so to me, it would be foolish for me to believe her that she's gonna change or she's gonna do better, which also remind me of I got into it, I think, yeah, I got into it with my dad, second wife or whatever, and I'm proud of myself for not telling the rest of my siblings and my boo think he was there. He tried to calm me down, but I refuse, and so, like the type of personality my dad, second wife have, I know what kind of person she is I don't like being around her, and this is one of the many reasons I I don't, and so my aunt that was on the podcast had felt like I'm putting my dad in and um awkward situation, and it's like I personally feel like I'm not, because I'm not making him choose.

Speaker 2: 19:01

I feel like what I'm doing is giving him Options where we can have a great relationship that doesn't involve her, and for me, I don't like how there's this thought process that everybody's supposed to like and love everybody, or people who are certain Um relatives, are supposed to get a certain amount of respect, because, you know, people always be like you only have one parent. Well, that parent only has one mom accused. What are we really doing? So I haven't had a chance to really talk to my therapist about it, but after that reading and hearing those words from Pamela about forgiveness and justice again, it's gonna be a slow process, for sure, but like I'm gonna try, I'm gonna try to forgive or whatever. So, um, I know this gonna seem so dumb, but y'all will be okay.

Speaker 2: 19:57

So the dictionary says forgive here's the definition to stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone for defense, flaw or mistake, and justice is a Behavior or treatment and I don't like that as a definition Okay, the quality of being fair and reasonable and stuff. So, like, I know it seems like, but yeah, it was just difficult for me, like I said during the reading, to be like how can you forgive someone and steal, um both, justice for them? And, like I said, let me understand that you can forgive someone for the things that they did and you can still ask the universe, god, the creator, the ancestors, to have that person seek justice. But, you know, when it comes to being stressed out, some of these things can weigh on your heart and stuff. So, again, again, I'm still going to be a working progress every day of the day, to evolve, but I don't know. So, anyway, I say all that to say that I want to encourage you to, at your own pace, if you want to forgive people because, as we know, forgiveness is for you. It's difficult and I ain't there yet, but I hope to be one day. Um, having that type of thought process, definitely, so I can become an honorable and enlightened ancestor.

Speaker 2: 21:40

Croak on the choke that's where I give you my bestest joke and we laugh together, or not? Today's joke, you are allowed to jump to conclusions. It's a leap here. It's a leap here, february 29th 2024. Well, guess, that's my cue to leave.